Starting out as a lad without a Dad was a solitary experience. I saw my Mom needed me. I soon became her protector. I watched as she struggled to make our lot in life better. She enrolled in adult education for Photography. She was a brilliant woman with only 2 years of high school. I quickly understood the power of women. Mom was tough and compassionate. She made what was a life of little material possessions a joy. Although she had little money she had some for those less fortunate than her. She made me eggnog each morning for breakfast. I hated eggnog but loved her so much that I never told her. I poured it out regularly rather than admit my distaste for the raw egg. Neva J knew she was preparing me for the rigors of the day ahead.

I learned early that I enjoyed the role of peacemaker. I had witnessed conflict and discovered that I had some ability to bring people together. Mom was not shackled to a form of religion instead she chose the faith of helping others. This was Christianity to me. She feared that she had colon cancer. I called her each day from school to check on her health.

As I began in church life I sought conciliation and agreement. If the goal was to make Heaven our home I understood that the walk of faith must start here and now. I left a church I loved when it morphed into an organization filled more with rebuke and recrimination rather than Christ’s message.

Work-life was the same for me. I tried to put people first and an excellent work-product followed. We all make mistakes, and we all need a second chance. When I was asked to lead the department I endeavored to lead by example and reminded myself daily that there were smarter people than me in the group. My father-in-law had a saying that I reminded myself of often, ‘Never let someone take your dignity.’

When I retired a person told me that many in his department liked my style of management. His comments were humbling. Servant leadership was my goal.

I knew a Chancellor who was a servant-leader. She inspired so many who had no voice. She would walk into a field being mowed by a Grounds worker to introduce herself and shake the person’s hand. No executive applauded her but we were amazed that we mattered to her.

My philosophy has brought me comfort. When an African American speaks well of me I am honored. When a person who lives with unique challenges remembers my name I am again…humbled. I listen to the ideas of others with an open mind and often I am convinced of their ideas.

We do not have all of the answers. We struggle to ask the questions. So many of us are like Billy B who had to save his money until he had a dime to go to State Street to purchase a glass of milk. Many of us did not have the 20 cents for the hot lunch and thus ate our brown bag sandwich in the first-grade classroom by ourselves.

Neva J bought me a ball glove and a baseball bat and played catch with me in the backyard. I have relished a game of catch to this day.