Many of us who have reached the Golden Years are familiar with the admonition Take Once daily. The instructions are also how to approach life. We live in the future. We live in the past. We have active brains. Our real-time life is occurring as I write this piece and it will transpire as you read it. A photo gives the subject of the picture the moment you snap it. It will look different a moment later. Each moment is important.

Each holiday I think about the holiday before. Those are not today. Today is unique. MJ and I enjoyed a movie the other evening where the character played a psychologist who told his class that they are made up of their experiences and thus different experiences would make them different. Later his life experiences proved his hypothesis.

So, life is new every morning and every moment. It is a wild ride and the ultimate adventure. Life is mysterious and we have yet to ascertain its depths. It morphs like a fun house mirror. It has the multi-colors of a kaleidoscope. It has the scares of a Stephen King novel. It has the thrill of a rollercoaster.

Happy Father’s Day…

Father’s Day Weekend is here. I always wanted to be in theatre and now I have the role of a lifetime. Nothing in life has suited me more.

Often I have observed others in search of Dad. We search for our father who is looking out for us. We desire Dad to have our back. Difficult questions about our involvement in the intricacies of our existence require Dad to give us sage advice. We want to see his benevolent gaze.

Home is where Dad is. Dad gives us a sense of place. No matter what happens we know that Dad has the wisdom of what we need.

Dad may take the personage of a good pastor. Dad can even be a good and caring boss. Dad can even take the form of a loving brother.

‘Neva J bought me a ball glove and baseball,’ Billy B said. ‘She and I have been playing catch and I am getting pretty good,’ he added with enthusiasm.

‘Thelma told me about the Birds and the Bees the other day what a wild ride,’ Chet said. ‘Before Dad passed away he said that it was just about time for the Talk,’ Chet went on to say with a sly grin.

‘Pastor Jack is a lot of fun he took us all fishing and he showed me how to bate a hook with a wiggly worm,’ Jane laughed. ‘When Tonia was bullying me he showed me how to box like a boxer, one hit and Tonia became my friend,’ Jane laughed.

‘I have a painting hanging in my bedroom of Christ sitting on a hill overlooking Jerusalem he has the saddest eyes as if he were the Dad of all that he surveyed,’ Billy B noted. ‘I felt that Jesus was my Dad and that he knew me,’ Billy B said.

‘I told Dad that I was Gay and he told me that he loved me and was proud of me,’ Joey S said with a tear of love in his eye.

‘Mr B I know that I have violated the rules and I am sorry…I will never do it again…you have a fatherly spirit that touches my heart,’ Valuable Colleague said…

None of us want peril. We want peace. Yet the ghost of peril is all around us. I have witnessed people who prognosticated peril just around the corner. Upon examination, I discovered the danger was within them; thus, they believed Armageddon was in store for their colleagues’ careers for the church and our nation. It is common for many to look out for internal struggles to extrapolate the same for their surroundings. I recall an assistant director telling me that our entire department was ready for privatization which would have meant my job and hundreds of others. Time would reveal his own criminal activity and subsequent prison sentence.

The fear of peril is daily in our nation’s nuclear deterrence policy. We look for and expect the other guy to shoot first and ask questions later. Leaders lead for a variety of reasons. Some are altruistic and others are the star of their own Hero Movie. Assumptions and instinct rule their political decisions.

Stress affects humans in many ways. Some rise to the occasion and possess a renewed focus commensurate to the problem. Others live in their head. Their thoughts are their counselors. Narcissism is found in many arenas.

Peril is the primary accusation of both the Republicans and Democrats. Each political party has this troubling feeling for a different set of reasons. Supreme Court Justice Samuel Alito said it would be nice if we could split the difference but some things cannot be negotiated. Justice Alito’s wife agreed with the person recording her that we need a return to holiness.

Who’s definition of holiness is she agreeing with. Mrs Alito went on to say in the recording that she had to look at a Pride Flag across her lake and that she wanted to erect a Sacred Heart of Jesus flag.

So many Christians attest that the United States is a Christian nation. What about the numerous religions of Americans who are not Christian? Do we respect their right of Faith or lack thereof as is enshrined in our Constitution?

My stepfather feard tornadoes and thus chose to drive around in the dark and study the black sky to determine which way to turn to dodge the storm.

We are at the tea party with Alice In Wonderland. Fantasy has become our creed and our friend. The Cheshire Cat is smiling. We read each word of the Bible and take the words that agree with our sense of peril. We ignore those words that we disagree with…

Hate rules our Christian Nationalism. It is not getting us very far. Countless millions have been killed in the name of religion. Yet the peril of contrasting faith communities continues.

Another lovely June day. Each day is precious when you live in the moment. A sense of place is comfort. Being comfortable in your own skin is priceless. I saw Shari Jade and Molly on my daily Woods Walk. They lifted my spirits.

‘It is almost Christmas in July,’ Billy B exclaimed! ‘I have an early Christmas gift for each of you,’ Billy B continued. ‘We must go to Pounds Hollow for a swim and exploration,’ he advised.

‘Are the gifts at the Hollow,’ Jane asked? ‘I know how you enjoy Christmas and your gifts are always special,’ she added. ‘One year you gave me a Schwinn Bicycle I have ridden it daily since,’ she laughed.

‘I am hoping for a Frankenstein mask and hands from Universal Studios,’ Chet intoned. ‘I have admired your Creature From The Black Lagoon ensemble for some time, Chet added with a wink and a nod.

‘As for me I hope it is a membership in the Wine of the Month Club I especially love Merlot,’ said Neva J. ‘The Ballon Wine that we make in the basement is great but not Merlot,’ she added.

‘Look at all of the June swimmers they have a peaceful aura,’ said Jane. ‘Are the Christmas in July gifts in the 57′ Chevy trunk,’ she asked. ‘The drive to Pounds Hollow is enjoyable with Neva J singing and the Moo and Cackle hamburgers to eat on the journey. ‘I visualize Christmas in December and all of its love and camaraderie,’ she noted with a happy tear.

‘Dad was with us last Christmas, he was very sick but he rallied for the big day and no one put more holiday spirit in the celebration than he,’ Chet said with happy tears and fond memories.

‘Rosie spent last Christmas with us she was so happy to be with people who loved and respected her,’ Neva J said. ‘She said that all she had known was being set apart and ignored unseen by people next to her in the grocery checkout line, Neva J continued. ‘We were her true family, Neva J said softly.

‘Chet, remember the times we swam beyond the rope out into the deep water over to the far bank of Pounds Hollow how exciting it was and the mysteries that we discovered,’ said Billy B. ‘We were invigorated and afraid of the unknown,’ he added. ‘I could not have made the swim if I had not known how to float,’ Billy B winked.

‘I recall how wonderful Star Trek was as an episode came out each week,’ Chet answered. ‘Adult life was the ultimate mystery we knew our lives were about to change,’ Chet commented.

‘Neva J made the best Roast Beast and her Christmas Coffee Cake was unparalleled,’ Jane said with gusto. ‘Her aluminum Christmas Tree with the color wheel shining upon it was a delight,’ she added. ‘Christmas with her was like living in two centuries the time of Dickens with Scrooge and Tiny Tim and the uncertainty of the 60s’,’ Jane observed.

‘The gifts are memories now that we are in our 60s’,’ Billy B said. ‘Where we have been has brought us to where we are,’ he whispered…

Peace is a valuable commodity. We seek it in the most peculiar places. King Midas sought it in the accumulation of gold. Often we do the same. If we can just obtain enough money we will be happy and secure. Money brings with it the respect of our peers in a capitalist society. I marveled at the placing of members of the Board of Trustees for our University in that they were by and large rich. Does money bring wisdom?

The same fiduciary construct exists in politics. Of late the perception of riches is as good as the riches. So those who have the money make the rules. They may be habitual liars but that is glossed over in favor of supplication to riches. The old saying that sticks and stones will break my bones but words will never hurt me is wrong. Words can do damage more than sticks and stones. Words lift up dictators and elevate imbeciles. Fascists enjoy the power of their untruthful rhetoric. Hitler assured the Germans he would elevate their country to its former glory. He did not tell them the price.

Churches bow their knees to money. It is easy to have two congregations in the same sanctuary. Those who have the pocketbook and prominence and those who have no voice. A popular doctrine sweeping much of the world is that serving Christ brings prosperity. The more money you give to the organization the more you will receive from God. Perhaps Jesus has his eyes on the shekles rather than the dove. Soon we need not look for humility and piety but McMansions and fine automobiles.

Peace can not be purchased. Peace is a state of mind.

‘I am looking forward to our time in the woods,’ Chet said.
When I feel down or depressed I find solace in the grandeur of God’s creation, he continued. ‘Mom sent some Oscar Mayer Wieners for us to roast but I want mine straight out of the wrapper,’ he laughed.

‘I am bringing along my laptop to do some writing the woods inspire me,’ Billy B said. ‘I get some of my best story ideas while listening to the birds sing and watching the creek flow over the sandstone,’ he said.

‘I have packed some Merlot hamburger and chips along with Hershey Bars and marshmallows of Smores,’ Neva J said with a wink and laugh. ‘Each time I am in the woods I feel like I am in church,’ she continued.

‘I enjoy being far removed from politics and pride,’ Jane said. ‘The artificial of politicians makes me nauseous, she noted. ‘Woods and flowing streams are my sanctuary, Jane explained.

‘We are here such a short time we waste so much of our beautiful gift with conmen and narcissists,’ Chet said with some knowledge. ‘Continually we are promised that which they have no intention of delivering except when it helps them,’ Chet continued. ‘A few good public servants go into the servitude of the people only to soon become rich and forget who sent them to their lofty office, he said.

‘Who is that man sitting by the rushing babbling creek,’ Neva J asked? ‘He looks strangely familiar,’ she added.

‘Would you like to join us for some Smores,’ Jane asked? ‘Come closer to our fire and we will tell tall tales and eat hot dogs and drink Merlot,’ Jane told the stranger.

‘I love Merlot and chocolate, Stranger said. ‘I have been waiting on you I am glad to join your camp feast,’ Stranger said. ‘I have become a bit chilly with the dark,’ he noted with a shiver.

‘Hold on my friend I have a hand-knitted sweater in the 57′ convertible that I will retrieve for you,’ Neva J said with a flourish.

‘Now I am fed and warmed,’ Stranger said. ‘Have you heard this song,’ as Stranger began to sing? ‘Jesus loves the little children all the little children of the world…red yellow black and white all are precious in his sight…Jesus loves the little children of the world.’

‘I have constructed you another Smore,’ Chet said joyfully.

‘Stranger was gone but his singing could still be heard…like the sound of many waters…

Starting out as a lad without a Dad was a solitary experience. I saw my Mom needed me. I soon became her protector. I watched as she struggled to make our lot in life better. She enrolled in adult education for Photography. She was a brilliant woman with only 2 years of high school. I quickly understood the power of women. Mom was tough and compassionate. She made what was a life of little material possessions a joy. Although she had little money she had some for those less fortunate than her. She made me eggnog each morning for breakfast. I hated eggnog but loved her so much that I never told her. I poured it out regularly rather than admit my distaste for the raw egg. Neva J knew she was preparing me for the rigors of the day ahead.

I learned early that I enjoyed the role of peacemaker. I had witnessed conflict and discovered that I had some ability to bring people together. Mom was not shackled to a form of religion instead she chose the faith of helping others. This was Christianity to me. She feared that she had colon cancer. I called her each day from school to check on her health.

As I began in church life I sought conciliation and agreement. If the goal was to make Heaven our home I understood that the walk of faith must start here and now. I left a church I loved when it morphed into an organization filled more with rebuke and recrimination rather than Christ’s message.

Work-life was the same for me. I tried to put people first and an excellent work-product followed. We all make mistakes, and we all need a second chance. When I was asked to lead the department I endeavored to lead by example and reminded myself daily that there were smarter people than me in the group. My father-in-law had a saying that I reminded myself of often, ‘Never let someone take your dignity.’

When I retired a person told me that many in his department liked my style of management. His comments were humbling. Servant leadership was my goal.

I knew a Chancellor who was a servant-leader. She inspired so many who had no voice. She would walk into a field being mowed by a Grounds worker to introduce herself and shake the person’s hand. No executive applauded her but we were amazed that we mattered to her.

My philosophy has brought me comfort. When an African American speaks well of me I am honored. When a person who lives with unique challenges remembers my name I am again…humbled. I listen to the ideas of others with an open mind and often I am convinced of their ideas.

We do not have all of the answers. We struggle to ask the questions. So many of us are like Billy B who had to save his money until he had a dime to go to State Street to purchase a glass of milk. Many of us did not have the 20 cents for the hot lunch and thus ate our brown bag sandwich in the first-grade classroom by ourselves.

Neva J bought me a ball glove and a baseball bat and played catch with me in the backyard. I have relished a game of catch to this day.

It is much cooler today and some lovely rain. It suits my solitary soul. I enjoy visiting cities but I have never wanted to live in one. Natural surroundings are my elixir. Mr. Squirrel is outside the Writing Porch. He seems content. Life is a beautiful pursuit.

Father’s Day is a week away and is a celebration of my greatest joy. Aaron and Jonathon are MJ and my consuming pleasure. Being near them lifts my spirit. I see their mother in them and even a little bit of me. What a miracle they are! Each time they share with me what they are doing I am blessed.

I reflect on the days of my youth. I was a searcher even then. I hoped to connect with the purpose of life and my role in it. I loved older folks and sought their company. I knew that they must have the answers to life’s persistent questions. When I began attending a little country church in Elkville I made a point of shaking hands with every congregation member. The church was comprised primarily of people of the golden years. They treated me warmly. I became convinced that the Christian life was worthy of pursuit.

I met my friend Jeff when we were teenagers. He was a member of a hippie commune living at the other end of Royalton Blacktop. Everyone there was so friendly. Many of the group were Jewish. We had matzo balls and Gefilte fish. They had a shower in the backyard that I used after staying overnight with them. The shower had a foot tub on top of its roof and a hose attached with a valve to turn on and off the water. I noticed that the view of the curtainless door was as far as the eye could see. They told me that there was more privacy when the corn was high.

The Bible was a new world. I became enamored with it. I had never experienced a group of people so loving and accepting. Peace is the province of Christ’s teachings.

We did not think of politics. We thought of living out the message of the sad-eyed Carpenter. My love of Reverend Billy Graham was that his message of Christ was simple and did not vary. Jesus loves you and why not come to him and find out. Jonathon and I heard him speak in St. Louis when he was 80.

Harsh words never help they hurt. Mean pronouncements and judgments of others are not the Message.

Many years ago Physical Plant administration at Southern Illinois University decided that the Housekeeping department needed expert advice. They hired consultants from Georgia at some expense. When their final report came back to us it was so convoluted and difficult to follow that the first thing I did when I became the superintendent was to throw the Georgia Report into the waste basket. They had attempted to make something simple…complex as an example of professionalism.

So it is with Christ’s message of love and acceptance. ‘Render unto Cesar the things that are Cesars and unto God the things that are Gods.’

Many disciplinary issues that I encountered were best handled as a collegial talk behind closed doors with an agreement to ‘go and sin no more.’ As long as we retain our dignity we reason together to avoid mistakes.

‘Weeping may endure for the night but joy cometh in the morning.’

We work hard so we can play. Playing is important. Whether it be on the beach or on holiday or at the beach on holiday we need to relax. New places and new faces put us in a sunny mood. We learn by mimicking others. Monkey see monkey do.

‘I am so excited about our trip to Disney World,’ said Jane enthusiastically! ‘I have wanted to go there since it opened and now I will soon be there,’ she said.

‘I hear that in the Hall Of The Presidents that they have robots that can talk to you,’ Billy B noted. ‘I plan on asking President Kennedy some questions,’ he continued.

‘They are Animatronics and can not answer questions,’ Chet said with a grin. ‘They are deceptively realistic, however,’ he added.

‘Welcome Billy B I have been waiting on you,’ President Kennedy said with a familiar smile. ‘I almost was late for the show this morning as I had not finished the papers and my second cup of coffee,’ Kennedy continued.

‘I was told that you could not answer questions,’ Billy B said with disbelief.

‘Well you may recall that they took my brain out for examination after my assassination, they gave it to Mr. Disney and he put it to good use,’ PK said with a wink and a nod. ‘President Nixon comes to me regularly for advice and I have visited him a few times in the White House,’ PK elaborated.

‘How is your aching back,’ Chet asked?

‘I threw away my back brace and have never felt better I am going to Hyannisport this weekend for a game of touch football,’ he winked…

Another overcast and rainy day. My kind of weather. The slowing of activities the peace of the pitter-patter of rain and my introverted outlook are a good correlation. Road work is all over town. Repairs are best accomplished in the warm months. Crisis enjoys the covering of clouds. We all face real dangers and then there are the valleys of our own making. It is important to see what needs to be done and do it. Throughout history, good people willing to ‘Say More’ have advanced our species.’

The former FBI Director had the habit of telling the briefer to say more. Solid information is essential to solid results. Truthful words dispel conspiracy theories. It is easy to sit back and let someone else take the heat when candid conversation is required.

I witnessed countless meetings where staff at high levels were afraid to speak truth to power. Agreement and supplication seem safe for the present distress. I watched our beloved University shrink from nearly 25 thousand students to a bit over 10 thousand today. The lack of ‘Say More’ can be directly attributable to the decline. It seemed to rise high in the organization that one must zip their lip, not rock the boat. The boss is always right and that includes their inane jokes. Laughing was required often manic.

There is a reason that a sinking ship does not have enough lifeboats.

So it goes with our nation. The truth of good governance lies between conservatives and liberals. If we are honest we all have a bit of both in our DNA. Neither side are devils masquerading as angels. We all want what is best for our children. We all want peace and economic opportunity. We all want to see our nation succeed.

Sophomore and goofy pronouncements are an illustration of our worst fears and nightmares. Our nation was founded on the idea that ‘all men are created equal.’ We love liberty. We want to be left alone when it comes to government overreach and to help our neighbor. Who people love is none of our business. Where they worship or if they do is none of our business.

We are a lighthouse in what is often a cruel world. Suffering families come to us for succor and oasis. That is our blessing and our burden. Children are hungry. We should feed them. To endanger the life of a mother to fulfill the autocratic desire of old white men is bizarre and wrong.

Change is fundamental. We left England and started our own country because we no longer wanted a king. ‘Live Free Or Die’ we said. We have a multitude of past sins that haunt us. We took the Native Americans land. We embraced slavery. So we are facing whether our almost 250-year experiment will endure another 250 years. Will we embrace the demographic changes in our nation or continue to pander to fascist ideology.

We Christians say that we want to make Heaven our home. Is that a Heaven of only those who look like us and believe what we believe, or does it include all of God’s children?

‘God’s work must surely be our own.’

June is one of my favorite months. It is the month of Neva J’s birth. Her birth certificate records her name as Neva Jane but all I ever knew was Neva June. She spent her life helping others. Countless people received monetary gifts from her that she never spoke of and no one but the recipient knew. She did not learn to drive until she was 30. She clutched the steering wheel as if it would get away from her. Even in the throws of Alzheimer’s disease she knew the words to every hymn and sang them with gusto. Her anger was firey but her forgiveness was immediate. Neva J understood what being poor meant. When she and my stepfather Earl enclosed the front porch of the farmhouse they had purchased for $1,800 she was elated with what she termed The New Room. The decor was black and red which have become my favorite colors in my senior years.

As I get closer to the end of the story I see Neva J’s wisdom.
Everyone had value. We are all God’s children. ‘Red yellow black and white we are precious in his sight.’

I see the young moms and dads bring their little children to the Woods to play on the playground equipment and remember the days when MJ and I did the same with Aaron and Jonathon. Time passes fast. The kids seem like they will be little forever when they are changing before your eyes.

At various times I have been a member of leadership both in church and at SIUC. I do not miss it I never sought it. I relish being unknown and one of God’s quiet folks. I never felt that I had anything extraordinary to offer for leading others and regularly sought to only help and not hurt.

Age and wisdom bring peace to our role in humanity’s story. Many could have accomplished my little successes, but I was allowed to play upon the stage of life to cause others to understand that they were loved, accepted, heard, and seen.

Often God uses rough-hewn wood and wood with the bark attached to help others. John The Baptist wore a coat of camel hair and ate locust and wild honey. He had neither attended seminary nor been tutored at the feet of the rabbis. Yet he knew that one was coming after him whose shoes he was unworthy to unbuckle.

Humility we seek. A humble spirit is difficult to find in our coterie of elected leaders. A leader who understands that they have been elected for a season and no more. A leader who does not fear the ‘slings and arrows of outrageous fortune,’

The wind of what is coming stirs about us. The Writer is still writing. We are actors on the stage of the grand performance.