The summer heat has arrived in Little Egypt. Also, a dangerous storm yesterday. We are already a bit concerned this time of year as on May 8, 2009, we suffered a Derecho. It was the worst storm in my memory of living in Southern Illinois and I have been doing so since 1962. The power was off for over a week and at Southern Illinois University my department had to prepare McAndrew Stadium by flashlight for an outdoor Commencement to be held the next day…under a brilliant sky of lightning. Our home received over 27 thousand dollars in damage. As a Friday afternoon Commencement was underway at Shryock Auditorium when the Derecho struck. Ancient massive trees were uprooted around Shryock and across Campus. When the proud parents and their glowing children entered the Auditorium it was calm…when they exited it looked like a bomb had gone off.

Life is funny when you think about it. The Shryock Attendees had only the joy of the special moment in their lives when they crossed the threshold of the Commencement Venue…when they exited over the same threshold…all around them had changed. We map out our lives and expect the map to be a faithful GPS. At times it is forced to recalculate… We are searchers on a Quest for spiritual meaning and purpose and the answer to The Secret. I enjoy hearing preachers and expositors and self-anointed prophets tell their congregations and whoever will listen to their passionate speech…that they have the answer and that they know for certain what awaits beyond this life.

The work required to recover after our Derecho was massive and time-consuming. There were no easy or pithy answers. No one called out and said follow me and I will rebuild your house or re-roof it or re-side it. No prognosticator cried out to the masses of we hot and tired people to just imagine that the trees were replanted and it would happen. Magical Thinking was not utilized.

So it goes with our Quest for Spiritual Understanding. The more we join hands and hearts together…the closer we get to…The Secret…

The One hollered at the Other! ‘You kicked me out of the house and never even checked on me to see if I was alright,’ One said. ‘Nobody kicked you out…you simply left,’ Other replied. ‘I was just a kid and knew nothing of the world and its dangers…you should have cared, One said. ‘You seemed to have all of the answers when you left,’ Other replied. ‘I was left to live on the streets of the City…I slept on rooftops to avoid being mugged or harassed or worse,’ One said. ‘I prayed for you each night,’ Other replied. ‘You and your religious friends did not seem to mind that I was hungry and cold and naked,’ One said. ‘I was watching and waiting,’ Other replied. ‘You disowned me and filled my space with your tradition and Tchotchkes,’ One said. ‘I was always watching,’ Other replied. ‘You were too hard…your rules were too strict…your love was conditional,’ One said. ‘I never moved…I am just where you saw me last…my love is unconditional,’ Other replied.

Sis said to Sister, ‘How did we become so far apart?’ ‘You are hardheaded…and obtuse…you changed,’ Sister replied. ‘I am the same…you scared me when we were young…you bullied me…you were mean,’ Sis said. ‘I was a kid just like you…I have grown…just like King Charles,’ Sister replied. ‘I think of you often,’ Sis said. ‘Well you never call…you do not even email,’ Sister replied. I wish things were different,’ Sis said. ‘Much too late for that now…after all I have my dignity to think of,’ Sister replied.

Friend said to Old Friend,’ I never cared that your politics was different than mine. Old Friend replied, ‘It matters when one political party is on God’s Side while the other is of the Devil. ‘We were biscuit-eating Pals and we worked side by side,’ Friend said. ‘Who is on the Lord’s side is my primary concern these days…you have changed…for the worse,’ Old Friend said. ‘I have been a Christian most of my life…and I feel it more now than I did then,’ Friend replied. ‘God will be the judge of that…the Bible is to be taken literally…word for word…and God has political leaders who help us to understand where to draw the line,’ Old Friend said. ‘Jesus loves the little children…all the children of the world…red, yellow, black and white all are precious in his site,’ Friend said. ‘All the little children that follow his Doctrine…some are tares among the wheat,’ Old Friend said. ‘Pray for me,’ Friend said. ‘If you repent and return to the Fold…I will,’ Old Friend said…

‘I simply can not believe that we are really in London to see the Coronation of King Charles,’ Neva J. said with a broad smile. ‘Dad wanted to bring us all over to be an eyewitness to something that has not occurred in 70 years,’ Daryl said. ‘I love hearing the drums and the practice sessions under the window of our flat in the middle of the night,’ Jane said. ‘You know I think I saw the King as he was being driven to a rehearsal,’ Chet added.

‘England and the monarchy and Queen Elizabeth intrigue me,’ Billy B. said. ‘I followed King Charles since he was a lad and all the happenings surrounding him,’ Neva J. mentioned. Queen Elizabeth was a study in class and dignity and rock solid leadership over many decades,’ Jane added. ‘Remember when we toured Parliament and the House of Lords as well,’ Billy B. asked? ‘Often I enjoy watching the BBC News on television more than our own news,’ Chet commented.

‘I had the strange waking dream last night…I was watching the Coronation Practice from our balcony and swore that I saw Queen Elizabeth standing along the sidewalks that were filled with onlookers…and when she saw me looking at her…she smiled her little smile and waved at me,’ Neva J. said with tears in her eyes…

‘There was a young woman standing next to Queen Elizabeth…she was beautiful and elegant…she looked up and smiled a smile that I remembered seeing many times…Princess Diana…’!

This is a big day for Star Wars Fans. When Aaron and Jonathon were children Star Wars began. I have seen every Star Wars with them. I enjoyed them all…but not as much as they did. I have always been a big fan of Harrison Ford and Chewbacca. Aaron and Jonathon had a collection of Star Wars Action Figures and I have even developed a small collection from Electric Larry’s…many years later. At the time Star Wars debut was transpiring I did not fathom what a worldwide effect that it would have. I understood a bit better when President Reagan named his missile defense Star Wars. The 1980s was a grand decade. It seemed that there were no limits to what we could accomplish. I vividly recall walking through the Walmart in Harrisburg, Illinois, and seeing Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom playing on their many television that was on. Grandpa Earl purchased a pocket watch for me and for Aaron and Jonathon at Walmart. Grandpa Earl loved Walmart. We had partaken of our regular Saturday night dinner at Ponderosa in Harrisburg and were feeling well-satisfied and ready for adventure. On one occasion we were at Walmart and Aaron who could not say many words at such a young age told his Grandpa Earl, ‘ Ball…Ball,’ as he gazed up at a regulation-size basketball. Aaron came home with the basketball.

Energy and hubris and unrealized potential consumed me in the 80s. I was married to the girl of my dreams and had two perfect sons. We often visited Earl and Neva J. on Saturdays and enjoyed boxed Franzia Wine and the National Enquirer and dinner at Ponderosa with Walmart to follow. I could not imagine life being more full or complete. If it was not dinner at Ponderosa and before that Bonanza…it was dinner at Dad’s Diner or Mimos Pizza. I pondered as to succeeding as a Building Custodian at Building Services at Southern Illinois University @ Carbondale. Building Custodian was the title of the Crew Supervisor in the department. I wondered if I would ever become a Foreman who supervised several Building Custodians. I was well under 30 years old and yet felt that I had been passed by for promotional opportunities.

We listened to a Prarie Home Companion with Garrison Keilor on the radio of the little Red Tempo car as we drove back to Elkville from Eldorado. Jonathon said that he did not understand why I enjoyed listening to Garrison as he found his voice somewhat depressing. Later Jonathon and I saw Garrison live at Shryock Auditorium @ SIUC…twice.

One Saturday night we were driving home from our weekly visit to Eldorado when MJ cried out, ‘Dear…Dear…Dear,’ to which I responded, ‘What…What…What,’ and then I learned she was referring to another Deer.

Eldorado was fun and simple and grounding in a sense of place and mission. Life is not the major events…it is a mixture of the minor happenings that years later are seared in your memory…and you realize the impression that they made on you.

The statue The Thinker was famous when I was a youngster. The Thinker reminds me of one of my favorite television characters, Mr. Spock. Mr. Spock critically analyzed all that he saw and heard…and even felt…he was half human you know… The thinking seems to be an underutilized ability in our society. Have you ever met someone who can sell igloos to Eskimos? Or what about someone who has a good deal on the Brooklyn Bridge? We get several calls per day on our landline that are for the purpose of selling us a thing that seems too good to be accurate and it is.

Marketing is fascinating. It has entered all fields of our lives. Some faiths will tell you to not think…or believe or question their doctrinal dictates…but rather to accept them without question as coming directly from the mouth of God. God and I have not set down for a one-on-one chat in some time…the phone line seems to be one way and then I listen for the spiritual edification of my Christian faith.

Politicians tell us that they love us…at election time. For the past many years, they have assured us that they have the same Faith as we do and that their political opponent does not. They live to do God’s Work and that self-same work is aligned with their constituent’s narrow views of their fellow human being’s worthiness.

Lonley we are. Loneliness contributes to a plethora of physical maladies. Our friends and confidants and comrades are on TV. We gather to visit with family and friends and can not tear ourselves away from our iPhones. Our best friends that are just behind our screens tell us what to think and we believe them. When the ocean wave of logical thinking smacks up against the rocks of our accepted doctrine of life…we understand that the ocean waves are…false waves.

‘One out of every two Americans is experiencing loneliness,’ according to the Surgeon General. So we search for groups behind the screen who we can identify with. We never have to physically meet them…but they influence us. For some their doors are locked and their guns are loaded and they are afraid of their own shadow.

Thinking is fundamental…

Well…winter past a while back but May 1st cemented the deal. There are a lot of people dancing around the May Pole today. It is cool in Carbondale and the wind is whipping about in a frenetic fashion. May Day is the day that all of the kids see as the countdown to their liberation.

‘Don’t you think that the water will be cold,’ Neva J. asked Billy B.? Not too cold for me as I have the skin of an alligator,’ Billy B. responded with a wink. ‘Pounds Hollow is my favorite spot except for the Orpheum Theatre,’ Chet remarked in a scholarly manner. ‘They are not open yet…you realize…not until Memorial Day and that is toward the end of May,’ Jane said. ‘No one will be there…we will sneak in through the gap in the fence,’ Billy B. chuckled. ‘What if the Forest Ranger catches us…what will we say…what will we do,’ said Cousin Brenda? ‘Run like hell,’ Chet offered.

The May Day Wind was whistling through the trees and the water on Pounds Hollow Lake was exhibiting the effect. ‘I think that I will keep my coat on…I have Merlot for all… let us have a drink before we put our toes in the icy water,’ Neva J. said as she poured the Merlot. ‘This place looks deserted and I do not remember it being covered with trees near the water,’ Jane observed. ‘You know come to think of it…you are right…it looks like it did when Rosebud and I were kids,’ Neva J. said as she savored her Merlot. ‘Rosebud would swim so far out that I could barely see her and would never have been able to make her out if I had not known that it was her little body bobbing up and down in the blue water,’ Neva J. continued. ‘I see three people almost at the far side of the Lake…and they are beckoning for us to swim over to them,’ Cousin Brenda said. ‘I wonder if they got in through the gap in the fence like we did,’ Chet asked?

‘Mom…’, Cousin Brenda said with joy and fear in her voice! ‘What are you folks doing out on a cool and windy May Day…you know that Pounds Hollow does not open up until Memorial Day…right,’ Rosebud asked with a wicked smile on her face? ‘You certainly look a lot like me when I was your age,’ Neva J. laughed. ‘I am you…Neva J…’

The gentleman at Hucks Gas station and the store told me that he admired my skull ring. He said that he enjoys skull rings but prefers silver ones…mine is stainless steel. Skulls have always intrigued me. They are what we look like without our masks. One of the first things that we learn when we arrive in our lives is that we are all temporary. My colleague was fond of saying that we struggle and strive but we will never get out of this world alive. I enjoy the cool temperatures as I seem to think a bit better when it is brisk.

Great monuments we seek to our skills and passion and accomplishments. Many times we have no idea what we have accomplished in the hearts of others. Each time that I visit Eldorado I am reminded of the wonderful people who started me on the road of education and who were selfless in their pursuit of excellence…for the sake of it. Teachers who insisted that I do it right and not cut corners.

I heard from my dear friend Brent and had my day uplifted. What a kind person he is! I have known my friend since we were both kids and I continue to be amazed at his insight and empathetic perception of his surroundings.

Being a Christian is somewhat like attending school in Eldorado. It is not glossy or filled with a laugh a minute or even a provider of the feeling of an electric shock going up your spine. It is slow and plodding with a sense of purpose and place and the humbling of lifelong learning.

No matter the excitement of the moment…you can trust that there will be many that are not so invigorating. Yet…they are all powerful and another block in the wall of…you…

‘Hope differed maketh the heart sick but when the desire cometh it is a tree of life.’

Most of us are people seeking balance. We are neither leaning over the left of our boat nor the right…we are sitting in the middle to ensure that it does not sink.

Ghosts are part of our lives. We may have a different definition of ghosts…but they are there…just around the corner. My friend Richard reminded me of ‘Ghosts from our past’; in fact, our past is an integral part of our present. We fashion our future from the jigsaw edges of our experiences.

‘I am certain that was Rosebud,’ Neva J. exclaimed! ‘Where was she when you saw her,’ Billy B. asked? ‘She was ahead of us in Giant City Woods this morning…When she looked around at me she grinned and motioned for me to follow her into a deeper section of the Wood,’ Neva J. said. ‘Have you ever met Rosebud,’ Chet asked Billy B? ‘No but I have heard much about her,’ he replied.

‘I do not think there is a sadder time than the death of your mother,’ Neva J. said. ‘Perhaps on par with that type of sadness is the death of your child,’ Jane offered. ‘Rosebud looks that same with her beautiful hair and glowing skin and dancing eyes,’ Neva J. said with a tear in her eye. ‘I have asked her why she does not visit more often and she told me that she is never far as she is next to the last of our lineage…I am the last,’ Neva J. said. At times we enjoy a glass of wine together and we laugh and laugh at her jokes,’ she continued. ‘Rosebud told me to call her Rose B. in honor of her maturity, Chet said. ‘So you have seen Rosebud recently,’ asked Billy B.? ‘Why yes…she sits behind me in class…you know the pretty blond-haired girl who is always smiling and is a bit shy,’ Chet said with some disbelief that Billy B. did not know the girl’s name.

‘Rose B. told me that she would be joining us on the nature hike at Giant City today in honor of her and Neva J.’s mom…Grace,’ Chet said. ‘I noticed that when we all took a trip to Hickory Hill Cemetery that next to Grace’s headstone was a small stone with only the name…Rosebud on it…’ Jane said in a hoarse whisper…

‘I have that new sweetener for your coffee, Dad,’ Billy B. said with a smile. ‘I have prepared some fried eggs and country ham along with hash brown potatoes…because I know that you love them, he continued. I saw a Harley on the street the other day and I thought of you…I have purchased a motorcycle jacket just like yours and a cap to match, Billy B. continued.

‘Hit the deck you rubberneck,’ Neva J. gleefully called out! ‘I have to make Dad another pot of coffee before I go…he loves his coffee,’ Billy B. responded. ‘Dad will be fine…now hurry or you will miss your bus,’ Neva J. admonished.

‘I tell you my Dad is an expert Harley Davidson rider…Evil Kenevil has nothing on him,’ Billy B. told Chet. ‘I would love to see your Dad’s motorcycle,’ Jane said. ‘I will have him drive it to school and do some tricks with it,’ Billy B. laughed. ‘Will your Dad join you for the Father and Son Potatosack Race next week,’ asked Chet. ‘He most certainly will be joining me…we have been practicing for a month,’ Billy B. noted with a wicked grin.

‘Dad I am happy that you sleep on the top bunk of my trundle bed each night…but doesn’t Mom miss you,’ Billy B. asked? ‘Her tears seem to cloud her vision a bit…I will hang out with you until she is feeling better…’

‘Schools out…schools out…teacher let the monkeys out,’ Billy B. sang. ‘Another month…and it will start getting hot in the classrooms,’ Chet observed. ‘May is the beginning of summer for me,’ Jane laughed. ‘There will be some half days in the end,’ Chet added. ‘Let us have a May Day Celebration,’ Daryl proclaimed! ‘You know with the May Pole and the streamers and the dancing and singing and a picnic on the ground,’ Daryl laughed a hearty guffaw. ‘We can gather wildflowers and green garlands and fashion a crown for the May Queen…and I will be a candidate for the honor,’ Jane exulted!

‘We must have a bonfire when it gets dark…and we will have Morris Dancing as I remember from my days in England,’ Daryl said. ‘We will have bell pads for our shins…and sticks and handkerchiefs to wave as we dance…and two clay tobacco pipes,’ Daryl winked. ‘What about the Hobby Horse…we can not forget the Hobby Horse,’ Neva J. said with a wide smile.

The May Day Festivities were awesome! The Morris Dancing was so intricate that Chet disappeared during the performance. Neva J. had brought the Merlot and it was as well received as the Meade that The Wiz had provided. ‘Has anyone seen Chet…he was dancing with the Morris Dancers and suddenly he was no longer there,’ Billy B. asked the group? ‘I noticed that he had a peculiar look on his face as if he was in another time…and his costume did not look hand sewn but original to the ones that I have seen in museums in Wales and Yorkshire,’ Daryl said with some concern. ‘Have you another pint of Meade for a thirsty dancer,’ said Billy B. to Neva J. ‘It is almost time for the crowning of the May Day Queen’ said Jane…’ and I think that I have got a good chance of winning the vote.’

The bonfire was warm and brilliant on a cool May Day evening. Jane had won and she began to ascend to the wicker throne…and have the wreath placed upon her head. Suddenly it became pitch black dark to the extent that you could not see your hand in front of your face…and then the bonfire reignited to a ferocious glow. There stood Chet behind Jane as he placed the laurel wreath upon her head…and they disappeared…