‘I Remember Mama’
My dear mother passed away in October of 2013. She and I experienced many difficult times together and we had a bond that was unbreakable.
Mom was born in Mt. Vernon, Illinois and she had five siblings from the Askew side of the family and five half brothers and sisters from the Quinn side of the family. She spoke of the Quinn’s often being hungry and having to search for persimmons to eat…to stave off starvation. The Quinn siblings were; Beulah, Guelda, Dutch…who went missing in World War II, and Donald…who had a heart attack from shoveling snow. I can not recall the fifth Quinn’s name? The Askew’s were; Vema and Gene and Wanda and Neva June…my mother, and Rosebud…who died in infancy.
Mom went to work in the shoe factory at the age of 16. She told me that she was so tired of being poor and thus did not finish the last two years of high school. Later, after she and my dad moved to Chicago, became a switchboard operator at the Hilton Hotel and on one occasion she put a call through from Nicky Hilton!
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Mom and dad married after he returned from the pacific theatre of World War II. She believed that he had a girlfriend in the islands due to his sending her photos of native women with bare breasts.
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I was born in St. Mary’s Hospital in Chicago and we lived in the city for the first two years of my life. We then moved to Sauk Village on the south side and enjoyed a, “Leave It To Beaver,’ type lifestyle for a few years. Mom had friends, Ivy our neighbor from across the street, and Helen from next door…and she loved to do the Twist…as sung by Chubby Checker!
If I have any altruism…or love and concern for others who are less fortunate than me…it came from my mom! Mom regularly searched for someone to help! If you were hungry and she had a five dollar bill…you soon would have $2.50!
Mom was an active listener. If you needed a confidant…she would spend all of the time required to hear your concerns and problems and then would console you, from her heart, and tell you, ‘It is going to be alright Kiddo!’
Our short-lived happy and care free lifestyle in Sauk Village was upended when my dad found another love. In an effort to attempt to repair their marriage we moved to Eldorado, Illinois where my grandmother Askew lived as well as my aunts, Vema and Guelda and Wanda..
After moving into a ghost house on Illinois Avenue, that was directly across from the Eldorado High School, I discovered what rats looked like, and how large they can become, and I understood what it was like to be cold!
The Eldorado move did not solve the relationship dilemma and dad left…only to return one last time and give me four silver dollars…and bid me farewell.
Mom was devastated and I determined that I was going to stick by her…and she in turn stuck by me! She slowly recovered and began to take photography classes through an adult education program and we decided that we were not going to be defeated!
Mom and I stood in Commodity lines, which was a program for the poor whereupon semi-trucks would open their doors and throw government cheese and potted meat and powdered milk to the poor masses…of which we were part!
Mom re-married a stable and hard working electrician, Earl Fitzsimmons, who provided a nice lifestyle for us. We could enjoy hamburger again rather than split pea soup.
For the last 40 + years of her life Mom was a dedicated christian. She loved Jesus and she loved to help anyone in need… of a hand outstretched!
Mom made me eggnog almost every morning for many years. I hated it…and it made me wretch! However, I would never say that to her…I loved her too much to hurt her feelings! I would throw the eggnog out the back door of our little house in Eldorado..when she left the kitchen…and once in a while…I would drink it if she did not leave the room!
After Earl died in 2001…Mom came to live with us. She was already well into Alzheimers Disease…and it progressively got worse. When my step-father passed I was thinking at his wake…that we were going to have to find a nursing home for mom…when Mary Jane said that she wanted for us to take her in. I was overcome by her expression of love for her mother-in-law!
I remembered the many hours that mom and Mary Jane would talk, over the years,…and mom would listen intently…and she loved her daughter!
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Labor Day Fairytale II
The conclusion of the Labor Day Fairytale!
So, there the Bump family was…at the hospital with Jane Bump’s twisted ankle! She was pleading for pain pills, and this was before oxycodone and she swore that she truly believed that she was dieing! The doctor arrive and subsequently x-rayed the injured area only to discover that it was but a light sprang. He bandaged it and prescribed St. Joseph Baby Aspirin.
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Now, Jim was taken to St. Mary’s hospital in Chicago and examined for the severe blow to his chest by the errant Jai alai ball that hit his at 87 miles per hour directly bin the center of his chest. He was found to be fine from his Jai alai injury but suffering from his 40 years of smoking and counseled to quit immediately!
George had decided that it was time to introduce Billy B. into the mafia lifestyle and he had…
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Peace Be With You
We have a custom in our church of passing the peace. This consists of the congregation shaking hands with their neighbor and saying, ‘peace be with you.’ I have not really thought about what we are saying to each other and wishing for each other until today.
A wonderful lady in the church wished me peace and then said, ‘you do not understand how great that wish is until you do not have it.’ I responded that I not only agreed with her but that I had experienced what it was like to not have peace.
On numerous occasion in my life I have felt the lack of peace. Peace is not a rubber stamp for christians. It is a daily seeking of God’s plan for your life and a giving of our worries to his care.
I have been in work situations that gave me great anxiety. Having much responsibility and no authority is a killer of peace.
I have witnessed illness stalk my family and I have spent many sleepless nights worrying about the outcome.
When my sons are unhappy…I am unhappy…and I rack my brain trying to come up with a solution to their dilemmas!
Perhaps you are in a marriage where you are not appreciated and your best…is never good enough?
It could be that your best efforts at making a living for your family…falls short of your bills and commitments and the needs of those that your are responsible for?
Is your supervisor treating you like chattel? Are you expected to conduct yourself like a wholly owned subsidiary of the boss?
Do you seek to be heard…do you have an opinion that that varies from the politically correct one?
Would you like to be acknowledged for who your, really, are? Would you like to be recognized for your place in society…whether it is Gay or Straight…Black or Hispanic or a member of the multitude of cultures that make up the melting pot of the United States of America?
Would you like to hold your head high in the congregation of the human family and say that, I am transgender and I am proud of who I am…and this is me!’
Would you like to say that I have a mental illness and I am alright and I am whole…and I am part of your community….all I desire is acceptance!
When God talks to you and reveals truths for your life and peace to your soul…would you like to share that with others without judgment and dogma entering the conversation?
Peace is like the firefly that we attempted to capture in jars when we were children. It is fragile and dainty and a bit like fairy dust. It exists for a moment in time…and then must be sought anew!
A Labor Day Fairytale!
A Labor Day from the past!
Billy B. loved Sauk Village. The street that he lived on was full of friends. There was Danny and Pauly on one end of the avenue and Susie and Steve, with his marionettes, on the other end of the placid tree lined road. The front porch of his house was as long as his house and covered with a roof and the floor was concrete. He and his friends could play on the porch when it was raining and feel secure and safe and dry. The house in Sauk Village had a concrete drive way and part of it was covered to protect the car. In the back yard there was a patio with a Weber charcoal grill and Billy’s dad grilled steaks and hamburgers and bratwurst on it…as well as corn on the cob and baked potatoes.
Ivy, his mom’s friend, came over daily to visit. She was very…
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Is The Matrix….Real?
‘Are we living in a computer simulation?’
‘The question seems absurd. Yet there are plenty of smart people who are convinced that this is not only possible but perhaps likely.’
‘In an influential paper that laid out the theory, the Oxford philosopher Nick Bostrom showed that at least one of their possibilities is true: 1) All human like civilizations in the universe go extinct before they develop the technological capacity to create simulated realities; 2) if all civilizations do reach this phase of technological maturity, none of them will bother to run simulations; 3) advanced civilizations wold have the ability to create many, many simulations, and that means there are many ore simulated worlds than non-simulated ones.’ Vox
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I was the Ari Melber news show last Friday and he asked two of his panelist what they thought the probability of this hypothesis was…and they answered on a scale of 1 – 10…5! Ari responded that 5 seems high to him!
I think that anyone who has lived much of life…would find this hypothesis incredible! If no other reason than the mountain top joys and the deepest valley sorrows that they have experienced during their walk back to Jerusalem.
When Reverend Archer pronounced Mary Jane…man and wife and I held my new wife’s hand on March 28, 1978…that was no computer program!
When I fed my first son Aaron his first bottle and marveled at his perfection and admired his little blue knit hat…that was no computer program!
When our second born son, Jonathon, jumped out of his crib. laughing an uproarious laugh, and scampered across the floor…that was no elaborate computer program!
When Christ said…follow me…that was no simulation!
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Now as far as understanding God’s mysterious creation and the infinite majesty of it…we have not even started!
Here is a question…how do we ignore the poor and the needy and the hungry among us and somehow blame the immigrant who’s is walking untold miles, with their little children and their babies in tow, to flee persecution and danger and death?
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I watched two movies on Netflix last night that covered the former Labor Secretary under President Bill Clinton. Mr. Reich is a brilliant man and a teacher and a scholar and an advocate for the poor. He illustrated in his documentaries that the majority of the riches in the United States is held by 400 people. No, you did not misread….400 people! The middle class is being increasingly squeezed out of existence and the poor…wonder where their next meal is coming from. Wages for the middle class have been flat since the 1970’s and in fact have decreased in purchasing power. Reich pointed out that when he first came to Washington D.C. in the late 1960’s that the city of our Government, ‘was a bit seedy.’
Robert Reich soon discovered that lobbyist were beginning to work, behind the scenes, to limit and form legislation to the companies likening that they worked for. This has gravitated to the fact that companies often wright the legislation that they want passed by the congress…and they dutifully pass it!
Reich contends that there is no reason that anyone who is working full time in the United States should not be able to achieve a middle class life style.
Why do we continue to blame the poorest among us for our social and economic maladies?
Since the 1970’s money has flowed upwards and wages for the working middle class has become flat and lost purchasing power.
‘CEOs made 287 times more money last year than their workers did.’
‘Unsurprisingly, the gap is obscene. The average chief executive of S&P earned 287 times more than their median employee last year, …’
‘American CEOs earned a staggering $14.5 million in 2018, on average, compared to $39,888 that rank and file worker made. And CEOs got $500,000 bump compared to the previous year, while the average US worker barely got more than $1,000.’ Vox
Reich pointed out that governments control how free markets operate. It is a myth that free market economies operate irrespective of their governments!
When we arrive in the next life that the creator has planned for us…we will be shocked and amazed at the truth of the real after life as opposed to our earthly preconceived notions! I believe that it will seem so logical and yet so hidden from our earthly and human understanding.
‘Roger look beautiful. He looked really beautiful. I don’t know how to describe it, but he looked peaceful, and he looked young.’
‘The one thing people might be surprised about- Roger said that he didn’t know if he could believe in God. He had his doubts. But toward the end, something really interesting happened. That week before Roger passed away. I would see him talk about having visited this other place. I thought he was hallucinating. I thought they were giving him too much medication. But the day before he passed away, he wrote me a note: ‘This is all an elaborate hoax.’ I asked him, ‘Whats a hoax?’ And he was talking about this world, this place. He said it was all an illusion. I thought he was confused. He wasn’t visiting heaven, not the way we think of heaven. He described it a a vastness that you can’t even imagine. It was a place where the past, present, and future were happening all at once.’ Chaz Ebert
Smile…It Is Almost September!
My favorite four months of the year are knocking at my door! I love autumn! The cooler temperatures and the falling leaves pumpkin spice coffee and the holiday season are my medicine for the year.
I will let you in on a little secret that you will not hear many people admit to….I like shorter days! Oh yes…you heard correctly….I enjoy long nights and shorter days. It could be something to do with the fact that I worked nearly 20 of my 32 + years at the University on evenings and night shifts.
The calm and measured grandeur of the earth at rest and preparing for its winters nap is an elixir to me and a balm for a weary soul. There is an order and a system and a methodical purpose to life with the kids in school and Southern Illinois University @ Carbondale in full fall swing. Life’s balance is on display when the sun filled fun of summer gives way to the quiet and studied academia of fall…with both eyes looking ahead towards Thanksgiving and Christmas.
No matter our age, a happy life is a mixture of work and play.
Oh, but, there are the ever present changes the come to our serene lives. Some by design while others must be reacted to…and they seem to be the predominate culprits!
Often we perform the same maneuvers to facilitate hurdling a roadblock that is in our path and, sadly, receive the same negative results.
Perhaps we desire to loose weight and refuse to make any changes toward that goal?
It could be that we work for a thoughtless bully. We continue to explain to the bully why they are the bully…and they continue to go right on down the bullying path.
Maybe we are facing a mountain and would rather burrow though it than climb it?
It has been said that the only thing that is certain about life…is change.
We can be members of a church and seeking Gods will for our future and refuse to change our way of doing things. We may say that I have been a member of this church for 50 years and we have always done it this way! We may point to our mother and father before us and exclaim that we are worshipping just like mom and dad did and that it worked just fine for them. As our numbers diminish and the society around us cries out for someone to care about them…perhaps we should change our way of doing certain things?
The earth changes each season. A tree loses all of its leaves in the fall. The green grass in my yard withers and dies and I no longer need my mowing service. The short sleeves that I enjoy wearing all summer yield to a sweater and then a jacket and then a coat…as the temperatures diminish from 100 degrees to 1 degree! Change is not only real… it is dynamic! It is the catalyst that propels we humans forward!
‘Two Coats’
‘Two coats were before me, an old and a new
I could have either, so what must I do
One coat was ugly and terribly torn
The other a new one, and never been worn’
‘I’ll tell you the best thing I ever did do
I laid off the old coat and put on the new’
‘The old coat was earthly and not fit to wear
I thought of it often and shed many a tear
Then there was a clean one presented to view
I laid off the old coat and put on the new’
‘The first man was early and made on the ground
We all bore his image, the whole world around
The next was my Savior from Heaven so fair
He gave me this new coat you now see me wear’
‘Now this coat it fits me and keeps me so warm
Its good in the winter, its good in the storm
My Savior has dressed me in garments so rare
He fills me with glory, his image I’ll bear’
Patty Loveless
Can We Get Out Of Gods Way?
I remember watching religious themed television on Sunday mornings while other families were getting ready for church. Now this was not cable television but rather three networks and two of them were fuzzy. One of the programs was entitled, A Lamp Unto My Feet, that was produced by CBS Television. The programs had morality lessons based on christianity and I thought that they were great! During my young years, before 11 years of age, we did not attend church…but I was captivated by Bible stories! I would see these wonderfully bound books in the waiting room at Ferrel Hospital in Eldorado, Illinois that had beautiful illustrations and a narrative that was made to order for my Biblical curiosity!
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Many years later, grown with kids of my own, I sent a card in from one of the, same, Bible story books…still found in doctor’s offices…and said that I was interested in learning how I could purchase a set of them for Aaron and Johnathon. Little did I understand that a Bible Story book salesman was going to come to my home to high pressure sell me my beloved books!
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We had just returned from a Gatlinburg, Tennessee vacation when what did I hear but a knock on my door. When the old German man entered he told me that he believed that it was God’s will for me to purchase a set of books! I, after listening to his sales pitch for 30 minutes, told him that I would think about it and would call him and let him know. He responded that he feared that Satan would enter my heart if I did not buy the books now and that he thought that he should speak with my wife. I assured him that my wife would throw him out if he spoke to her in such a manner as he had to me…and he gathered his books and left.
I later purchased the books and have them to this day! I also noted to the salesman that apparently Satan had not entered my heart!
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One of the most exciting experiences that I witnessed during my early years as a christian was the influx of about 40, primarily Jewish Hippies, to our little non-denominational church located on the Royalton blacktop road in Elkville, Illinois. The group was comprised of some from wealthy homes and others from the middle class… and one who was an orphan and who had been homeless and slept on the streets of Chicago.
The hippie commune, which I visited and stayed over night and showered in the corn field, was at the other end of the blacktop.
We were a small church of under 100 parishioners. When the hippies came…they not only found a welcoming and loving congregation and pastor but they discovered a family that they had been hungering for!
This church event was so unusual and unprecedented that people came from miles around to see what was going on in the little…poor church in the village of Elkville! The young people that came became christians and subsequently…’Jews for Jesus.’
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Religious leaders in the Southern Illinois area marveled and rejoiced in the manifest witness of Gods outreach and dynamic magnetic drawing of his children to him…while others scoffed and criticized and turned their head and walked sadly away!
The Chicago orphan is my lifelong friend Jeff. He and his wife live in London. Jeff is the CEO of Genistar and works tirelessly to help others. He has enriched the lives of countless people that come from difficult situations and life events! I see their photos and read their testimonies regarding the difference that Jeff has made in their lives and I remember the little hippie boy…my friend….almost 50 years ago….
I spent my career at Southern Illinois University @ Carbondale. During my over 32 years of service I interacted with thousands of students. Many of these students come from broken homes or are latch-key children…or are battling mental and emotional challenges. There is one overriding theme that is an umbrella over so many of these young people…they are lonely!
Pastor Archer was able to think outside the box when the 40 hippies came to his church. I witnessed tears stream down his face as he demonstrated to them the love of a father figure. The congregants of our little church were salt of the earth Southern Illinoisans. They loved the lonely hippies…they did not think of the hair or the clothes…they saw their hearts!
My first hand witness of God bringing his sheep to someone who would care for them and love them…was a seminal event in my christian experience! I understood that to follow Jesus…was to first get out of the way of what he was wanting to do with his children…and to be his representative to every hurting and lonely human being!
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Mystery At The Fair
The Fair continues to provide surprises!
Carl and Billy B. walked out of Merlin’s tent wondering what type of tiny projector had been hooked up to the crystal ball where they had just watched the strangest, seemingly unrelated, events projected on? The proper decision seemed to be to find Sam Malone’s Taffy stand and proceed to enjoy the best taffy east of the Mississippi river!
When they presented themselves in front of Sam he was singing his famous taffy making song: ‘Mama likes taffy and daddy likes taffy…and so does Dick and Jane…even Spot the dog like taffy! So good….get it now….get it now!’
Sam would take massive rolls of fresh and soft taffy off of the roller with his his massive arms and hands and begin to throw the sweet confection high into the air and let it land on a large wooden table…whereupon he would turn it over and cast it into the air…
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The Fair
A evening at the Fair!
School had been in session for one week and had it ever been hot in the classrooms! Billy Bump and his buddy Carl had been looking forward, with anxious anticipation, for the Friday night opening of the fair. There was customarily a parade just before the gates were unlocked to the fair grounds. In the parade throng there were local celebrities, such as Minnesota Fats who lived just down the road, and as many politicians that could squeeze in. The Governor was marching along with the first lady and he was smiling from ear to ear and passing out candy to the children and kissing every baby that was offered to him. He waved with the back of his hand…much as Billy B. had seen Queen Elizabeth of England do in the news.
Leading the parade was a jockey riding a horse drawn chariot signifying the world renown harness race…
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Boots
Life can get you down. The stress of working a job that has become more of a burden than a blessing and the overwhelming feeling that your efforts are not appreciated is a prescription for the blues.
It seems in our roaring economy…the Bull has not visited many of us? Attrition is a pair of concrete overshoes for those who remain working, as they stand at the precipice of the ‘slough of despond,’ with the implied promise that you may be next it you can not keep up!
We visited the Orthopedic Institute this morning and I could not help but observe how busy the nurses were. Their serious countenances and ceaseless efforts to care for the many patients that were at the facility reminded me that most people in todays American economy are overworked and underpaid.
As our country has exported virtually all of its manufacturing jobs and replaced them with a service industry…we have become the losers!
In Southern Illinois the two primary employers are the university and the health care industry. I have been retired for nearly 9 years and SIUC has not had a raise since I left at the end of 2010. When no raise is received a worker is loosing money due to the cost of living.
The glossy unemployment numbers in the United States do not reveal; the underemployed, individuals who hold multiple jobs, or those who have simply given up looking for employment. I looked with great interest during the last presidential election cycle when presidential candidate Bernie Sanders touted that minimum wage needed to be at least $15 per hour. Shortly thereafter, McDonalds in New York State, began paying $15 per hour to their employees. Upon closer investigation I noticed that many of McDonalds staff were working in fast food as their primary employment.
I heard the President say the other day that the American people were loaded up with cash and very rich since the tax cut that he implemented. Obviously he is not talking to the same people that I am!
When you have money and means and houses and lands…it is easy to talk about poor individuals and the working class in this country, ‘pulling themselves up by their boot straps!’ That is easier said than done when you have no boots!
I was speaking with a friend the other day and she was planning on furthering her education. She currently works in the food service industry. Now, this goal is laudable and attainable…but it is similar to doing a juggling act on a 50 foot high wire while riding a unicycle! Oh, did I mention that there is no safety net?
Our nation desperately needs federally funded education programs that are similar to the World War II G.I. Bill. When I began at Southern Illinois University @ Carbondale and up to and including today there are professors who obtained their education through the G.I. Bill.
Sadly we obsess over minuate and quibble over the ephemeral and support inane political arguments that look pleasing to the far left and to the far right…when we should be providing boots to the needy!
Note: Photos and images are courtesy of Google.
