Five days until Christmas…and Rudolph could not be found. Billy B. and Chet had been given the task of locating him but so far…to no avail. Humphrey, the Lead Elf in charge of Toy Manufacturing, was beside himself…literally, as he had requested his twin brother, Hobart, join him for the last few days of toy work…before the big event. While Humphrey was a bit polished and cultured and somewhat debonair…Hobart was rough or un-planed around the edges. Hobart had misunderstood his help to be in the form of assisting his brother in the management of the Toy Shop…when in reality Humphrey wanted him to create his famous Wooden Rocking Horses. Rudolph had last been seen when Hobart had reprimanded him for being in the way in the Toy Shop and gave him a hammer and some finishing nails. Now Rudolph was a rather sensitive sort…as most Artists are…and he understood that his duties were more important, in his mind than Hobart’s, and thus he said to Evelyn the Elf, ‘Let Hobart lead the reindeer this Christmas Eve…I am off to Destin, Florida for some white sand and beautiful green Gulf Coast water.’

Santa said, ‘Billy B. and Chet…you must fly down to Destin and see if you can find Rudolph…we can not make the trip without him…he is the only one who has a red nose. Chet responded, ‘Santa, indeed his nose does have a nice red glow…but your nose gets quite red after you have had a couple of Dirty Martinis…’ Santa said, ‘Never mind about that, Chet, Santa takes a Dirty Martini now and then for his arthritis.’ ‘Now go quickly as Rudolph is probably at Wine World in Watercolor…as it is his favorite hang-out, Santa exclaimed!

Jane said that she wanted to accompany Billy B. and Chet as Rudolph listened to her…while he might not accept what the two gentlemen had to say. Billy B. agreed and off they flew…’like the down of a thistle…as Clement Clark Moore said so eloquently. Soon they had landed on the sugar-white beaches of Miramar Beach and saw Rudolphs’ Girlfriend lounging in a beach chair. Candy Kane was a Florida Reindeer…by birth…and there were not many like her. She was an alligator hunter and smoked cigars and drank Bullett Rye Whiskey…straight…and all day long. ‘Hey Jane,’ said CK. ‘What are you good people doing here this close to Christmas Eve…this is Crunch Time…’ Jane asked, ‘Where is Rudy…Santa needs him…and Hobart is sorry for offending him.’ ‘Rudy and Ron and JB have been drinking wine at Wine World…all day…and solving the world’s problems,’ CK said. ‘Let’s take the mini-sleigh and fly over there to talk to Rudy,’ said Chet. In the blink of an eye…they were there. ‘Join us,’ Rudy called out as his nose glowed a brilliant red beacon… ‘Rudy…Santa needs you and Hobart is sorry for telling you to get out of the Toy Factory,’ said Jane. ‘I don’t know…Jane…I think Santa hired him to boss me around…and I have better things to do than to be insulted…I have my 401K…and early retirement is looking pretty…pretty…pretty…sweet, as Larry David of Curb Your Enthusiasm, would say,’ said a thick-tongued philosophical Rudy… ‘Think of the kids…Santa can not do this massive undertaking without you…Rudy,’ Chet implored. ‘Will there be the annual Christmas Party at the end of the Christmas Eve Trip…I enjoy that Party so very much said, Rudy. ‘This year there will not only be a party but a 25% Christmas bonus…and a subscription to the Jelly Of the Month Club’…said Billy B.

Rudy not only returned to the North Pole but was the hero of the reindeer for the 25% bonus…and the wonderful…Jelly…

Home is what we seek at Christmas Time. We look for the sights and sounds and smells and the sense of place and love that makes our hearts swell…with joy. We may seek the home that we were born in or raised in…or the place that made us feel most welcome in our wayfaring life… We all are strangers in a strange land.

We are seekers of home…our entire time on earth. When we look into the eyes of others…we are looking for a home… This year we will enjoy Christmas in as many ways as the number of us that celebrate Christmas Some of us will have a large elaborate dinner with family that we have not seen since last Christmas. Others will have an intimate dinner with a few close friends…others of us will have pizza and Coca Cola…and all of us will hopefully find Home…in the celebration.

Atheists and agnostics and Jews and Hindus and Muslims…will seek home during our worldwide holiday. Rest from the stress of our 2-year Pandemic…comfort from the supreme loss that many of us have endured…many who seek to comfort others all year long…desire to feel a sense of Home…for Christmas. We have stood at the bedside of a loved one who has been intubated…we have cried a river of tears for family and friends who have passed on…many of us suffer inside…while putting on a brave and festive face…

We need Home to invite us inside…to sit down by the roaring fireplace…and to pet the sleeping Boxer dog by the warm blaze…and to enjoy a cup of hot cocoa and listen to Bing Crosby sing Silent Night…and gently close our eyes and realize that we finally have arrived…Home…

Five days until Christmas. It is a lovely day in Little Egypt…with an appropriate temperature for two days before the beginning of winter. Yesterday it truly looked like the Christmas Season was in full array with a 30-minute wait at the Post Office and traffic abounding on every street and lane. Pastor Kerry spoke of his favorite Christmas television show, A Charlie Brown Christmas, and it is one of my favorites as well… I remember first seeing the program when it Premiered in 1965. I was 8 years old and enjoyed the show…as I loved the Peanuts characters…but I was mesmerized when Linus recited the Biblical account of the birth of Jesus… Peanuts was a popular cartoon…and yet the miracle of Christ’s birth was an integral part of the program.

Uncertainty barks at our heels. In the height of our revelries and at the zenith of our joy…change and reversals and danger…lurk. A new variant of covid is sweeping the globe. Christmas travel is upon us…fellowship with family and friends and loved ones…is here… Vaccinations and booster shots are required…and yet there is still danger… If we did not remember the past…we would believe that someone is out to get us. Life is challenging and seemingly never more so…than today. But…our ancestors experienced a lot of bad days. The devastation of the Great Depression…World War II…Korean War…Vietnam… LIfe is more of a roller coaster ride than a walk in the park. We are happiest when we focus on the well-being of others.

Station Eleven is a great book that is written by Emily St. John Mandel that has been made into a limited min-series on HBO/Max. It is a hopeful post-apocalyptical program about the beauty of life and a Shakesperean Theatre Troop that travels throughout the land…and brings Art and hope to the survivors of a pandemic. Indeed it may seem like the worst of times to have a show about a pandemic when we are in the midst of a pandemic…but it is a show of hope and faith and life…that is appropriate for our times.

So, we must get vaccinated and boosted and wear a face mask and if we do so…the devastation of our Pandemic will subside and life can return to normalcy…as we know it. Spells or incantations or political rhetoric will not stop covid…vaccination will…if we all partake…and stop providing a home for the Virus…

Billy B. woke up with a smile on his face…as big as Southern Illinois University @ Carbondale. It was 1 week until Christmas Eve…and he and Chet and Jane and Daryl…had a lot of work to do to help Santa restore the meaning of Christmas to a Pandemic Plagued Earth. Santa had been studying the disbelief problem most of his career…but it had grown exponentially during 2020 & 2021. Many of the children of the world had ceased to come to visit him in the grand department stores and malls and the many Christmas Villages…due to their fear of becoming ill. One of his best receptions was in Gatlinburg, Tennessee. Santa had been accused of being a perpetrator of the commercialization of Christmas…but he knew the truth of the matter. He had been called by many names throughout time and known in different forms and missions in various countries. Father Christmas…Piere Noel…and St. Nicholas were among some of his esteemed titles. This year Santa and Billy B. and Chet and Jane and Daryl would assist Santa in delivering a handmade wood Nativity to every home that they visited. These Nativities were handcrafted throughout the world by skilled artisans who made each scene of the Baby Jesus’s birth…with love.

Jane had suggested to Santa that perhaps we had gotten the entire Spirit of Christmas…wrong…when we focus more on the celebration and less on the event that we are having a party…with gifts…for? She gave the example that it was a bit like having a birthday party for a newborn…and the child being left in the bedroom…while the gift-giving and the cake eating and the punch drinking…was miles away in the Civic Center…

Billy B. said that the most meaningful Christmas Seasons that he could remember were the ones where he and his family attended their church’s Christmas Eve Service and sang Silent Night…by candlelight… He went on to note that his thoughts were not on how many Christmas Gifts that he was about to receive…but rather on the gift of Christ’s Birth.

Chet noted that he really did not feel the Christmas Spirit until he observed the kindness of one human to another human…or saw the childlike wonder in an old person’s eyes…or heard the Christmas Eve Bells.

Daryl said, ‘My Christmas Prayer is that everyone can and will receive vaccinations for our Pandemic…and that we all will begin the New Year understanding that…we are all one family…we can not make it without each other…and if a member of my family experiences success…I have succeeded…

The wind has gusted and the rain has fallen…Winter is almost here. Christmas Eve is a week away…and have you completed your Christmas shopping? I was in our Mall this morning and took note that Santa was upon his throne and prepared to take requests from all the children that would like to speak with him. The Mall was strangely almost empty…as our Pandemic has changed the manner in which we Christmas shop…along with the convenience of online shopping. About 1/3 of the people that I met had face masks on while 2/3 seemed oblivious to the danger of COVID 19 or the fact that it has robbed the lives of 1 of 100 of our senior citizens…of which I am a member in good standing. I recall the halcyon days of our University Mall when the halls were crowded with Holiday Shoppers and the stores were resplendent with Christmas decorations and Holiday music and sales that were compelling. Now…most of the stores are shuttered…Aaron and Jonathon and my favorite Pub…that I referred to as ‘Cheers’ …is shuttered…and Carbondale’s recovery is slow…but its people are strong…

Aaron and Jonathon and I love to visit Electric Larry’s Emporium. The owner is such a nice person and he has so many eclectic items of supreme interest to a Baby Boomer…like me. I have great respect for his opening a small business in our difficult Retail Environment. I purchased a lovely 1950’s Vintage Turquoise Ceramic California Pottery Ashtray…Saturday. There were two of them and I am thinking of going back to buy the other one.

We seek the Spirit of Christmas and the kindness of the Reformed Scrooge…and the faith of Tiny Tim. We long for those who will not judge us…but who will be kind to us…and love us…and take us into their family… We all wonder why we can not have Peace On Earth…as it seems that almost all of us want it… I enjoyed a Facebook Illustration a few minutes ago which showed a young woman holding a lovely Vase…she dropped the Vase and it shattered into shards…the third panel displays her holding the broken pieces…glued to a piece of cardboard and framed with the caption…Mosaic… Our lives are indeed…Mosaics. We all have been broken…many times…and yet we walk forward with our beautiful hues and brilliant colors and interesting shapes and molding that has been created by fire and pressure and now we are Diamonds…seeking acceptance and love…and kindness…

‘Nine days until the Big Ride’…said Humphrey the Lead Factory Elf. Santa looked at his right-hand Elf…and thought, ‘I am tired…and no one ever considers that I would like a Christmas Gift…from time to time.’ Humphrey noticed the dejected and downtrodden look on Santa’s round and usually florid and jolly face. Santa’s Meerschaum pipe had been cracked at the Christmas Party that Billy B. and Chet and Jane and Daryl and his dad…The Wiz had invited him to when Chet had jumped off his lap when the Hillcrest Third Grade Class had simultaneously pulled 30 English Christmas Crackers. Mrs. Claus…Carolyn… had bought him some Christmas Pipe tobacco…but now he had no Meerschaum pipe to smoke it in. The Christmas Pipe was a big deal to Santa…after all he had been interviewed by Clement Clarke Moore for his famous poem…A Visit from St. Nicholas…where he is portrayed as, ‘The stump of his pipe he held tight in his teeth, and the smoke, and the smoke it encircled his head like a wreath…’

Billy B. knew immediately what to do after Humphrey telephoned him about the Great Christmas Pipe Quandry. He went to visit his friend at Yesteryear Tobacconist in Carbondale, Illinois, and told him of Santa’s unique Christmas Pipe needs. Mr. P. the famous Rugby Player…said that he would get to work on the new Meerschaum Pipe for Santa and that he would work night and day and throughout the weekend and would have it ready for the Jolly Old Elf…Monday night…after dark…as it became dark in Carbondale…before 5:00 P:M: Mr. P. went on the say that he was ordering Santa some special blend of Christmas tobacco and that one was entitled…Christmas Eve…and the other was…Christmas Morning…

Monday afternoon at 4:45 P:M: Santa and Humphrey and Chet and Billy B. arrived at Yesteryear Tobacconist…and Mr. P. opened the door with a wide Christmas Smile on his face. Santa was so pleased when he laid his eyes on the new glistening Meerschaum Christmas Pipe that Mr. P. had painstakingly handmade for Father Christmas. Santa said, ‘You know I am just not myself without my trademark Christmas Pipe…and the new Christmas Tobacco is to die for…’ Chet asked Santa, ‘Santa…would you be willing to acknowledge Mr. P.’s manufacturing of your Christmas Pipe…?’ Santa replied that he would like for Mr. and Mrs. P. to move to the North Pole and be his exclusive Christmas Pipe Manufacturers…and that he knew of a lot of potential customers…’ Santa then said, ‘I will put out ads for your pipes on Facebook and all social media…as well as television and print media.’ ‘Mr. P….you will be known as the Master Pipe Maker for Santa Claus…and you will have more business…than you can handle!’

Humphrey Bogart said, ‘Heres Looking At You…Kid…’

Have you ever sought Waldo? During the 1980s the Books regarding ‘Where’s Waldo’ were all the rage. I have spent a significant amount of time seeking Waldo… You would think that Waldo would not blend in so well…what with his colorful sock hat and his bright striped shirt…but he can get lost pretty easily. So…when I would find Waldo…it was a time of great joy.

Christmas Traditions change through the years. A long time ago I often heard of offices and churches and social groups drawing each other’s names out of a hat and thus becoming the Secret Santa for the unsuspecting person whose name they had drawn. The fun was in buying a Christmas gift for someone who you knew on a casual basis. Usually, there seemed to be a dollar limit involved and a Christmas Party where the participants would gather together to exchange gifts and to discover who their Secret Santa was. Then entailed much laughter and rejoicing as each person unwrapped their gift and saw either a gag gift or a necktie with Santa and his elves…or an Ugly Christmas Sweater…

There is a bit more of all of us seeking our Secret Santa. For every 100 elderly in the United States…1 has died of our Pandemic. Recent studies have illustrated that there is a plague of mental illness among our young. School Shootings have become common…in the Land of the Free…and the Home of the Brave… In our Crusade for ‘Protecting my Rights’, we have discovered that our rights can result in terrible Wrongs…for our neighbor.

Sound Bites are…our literature of choice in 2021… Slogans…are our Poems. Truth is what pacifies our personal belief system…

We search for the Christ Child born in Bethlehem… We search for the Baby that was lain in a manger…because there was no room for him in the inn… We search for Peace among the noise of materialism and idols and icons…

Mame had it right when she sang…’We need a little Christmas…right this very minute…’

Billy B. was thinking about his childhood in Eldorado during the 1960s. He recalled his friend, Jeff, telling him that he, Billy B., reminded him of Charlie Brown…of Charles Schulz Peanuts comic strip and the television premiere of A Charlie Brown Christmas…in 1965. This comment had been a great compliment to Billy B. as he loved Peanuts and the antics of Charlie Brown and Linus and Snoopy and Lucy and Peppermint Patty…and of course Woodstock. The Linus and Lucy Theme Song by the Vince Gauraldi Trio…was his favorite music. Billy B. could visualize his role as Charlie Brown and Chet as Linus and Jeff C. as Snoopy. Many of the events that happened in the Third Grade of Hillcrest School…reminded Billy B. of the stories from Peanuts.

‘Billy B….do you really believe that if we enter your mom’s Magic Mirror…we can be a part of the Peanuts Gang and even be in ‘A Charlie Brown Christmas,’ asked Chet? ‘The Wiz assured me that all we have to do is utter the words, A Charlie Brown Christmas…Pass…and then walk into the Magic Mirror,’ replied Billy B. ‘Jane is coming as well as Jeff C. and Tommy is joining us…as he loves Pig Pen! Now Neva J. had a Magic Mirror that she had visited the Sleeping Prophet, Edgar Cayce through. Neva J. loved Antiques and what she and her mom referred to as…Antiquing. Grace had a song that she often sang, ‘Antique…Antique…You’ll never lose your worth…Antique…Antique…the greatest thing on earth.’ Grace was a dedicated Christian as well as believing all of the events recorded in the Bible…including the existence of the Devil and Demons and the Lake of Fire and Armageddon where the blood will run as high as the horse’s bridle… Grace was a serious eclectic…Fundamentalist…

December 24…Christmas Eve arrived and the intrepid Magic Mirror Travelers were assembled in Neva J.’s bedroom in front of her Antique Magic Mirror that had been owned by the renowned Magician…Harry Houdini… Harry H. had purchased the Magic Mirror at the beginning of his career from an ancient Gypsy from Hungary…the country of his birth. Neva J. had purchased the Magic Mirror from Bess Houdini, Harry’s wife in 1940, in the town of Needles, California during a driving holiday that she and Billy B.’s; father, Willam, had taken. They had rented a UHaul to haul the large ornate Mahogony Magic Mirror back from California…first to Chicago…and later to Eldorado, Illinois. Neva J. loved her Mirror from Bess Houdini and relished telling the story of talking with Bess when she was in the Antique Emporium in Needles, California. Bess had told Neva J. that much of Harry’s success during his illustrious career could be attributed to the Magic Mirror. Harry and she had visited many of the mysterious places of the world and had discovered Magic that aided Harry in many of his death-defying escapes… She went on to tell Neva J. that she visited Harry through the Magic Mirror and the only reason that she was selling it to her was due to not having need of it much longer as the time of her death was approaching.

Chet and Billy B. and Jane and Jeff C. and Tommy L. walked into the Magic Mirror…and there was the Peanuts Creator…Charles Schulz…on set and directing each Peanut character where to stand…and then he called out…’Extras…take your places…’ Charlie Brown told Billy B., ‘Nice hat…man.’ Lucy said to Jane, ‘Do not go after my man…C.B…I steal the football from him…but I secretly love him…’ Snoopy laughed at Jeff C. and said, ‘Have you ever slept on top of a Dog House?’ Pig Pen arrived amidst a cloud of dust and told Tommy L., ‘Follow my lead.’ Linus walked up to Chet and pulled out from seemingly nowhere…a blanket and snapped it like a whip…and said, ‘You are going to be needing this…my good man…and if I forget a scripture in the Christmas Story…I will say…line…and you will whisper the line to me from the King James Bible that you will have open and you will be dutifully following my recitation of the wonderful Natviviy Story…’

And they all began to dance…with their noses pointed skyward…around the Christmas Tree…

Billy B. was in the mood for some Christmas fun. He and Chet and Jane and Daryl had planned to have a Christmas Party at Daryl’s house for Christmas Eve. Now Daryl and his dad, who was the third-grade teacher… enjoyed being called…The Wiz and Darly were from Bath, England. They were accustomed to Christmas Crackers. These are festive decorations for the table and make a snapping sound when pulled open…and often contain a small gift. Billy B. knew that if enough of the Christmas Crakers were pulled at one time…they would startle Santa Claus when he visited them at the Christmas Eve Party. The plan was to have Chet sit on Santa’s lap and ask for a Red Rider BB Gun and when Santa said, ‘You’ll shoot your eye out kid…’, (Courtesy of A Christmas Story) Daryl and The Wiz and Jane and Billy B. would pull several Crackers apart at once…and then enjoy the melee… Billy B. simply knew that Santa Claus…with his good nature and jolly spirit…would get the joke and laugh the loudest and longest…

Jane wondered if Billy B.’s idea really had merit. She knew that the look on Santa’s face would be great fun…but he was a gentleman of advanced age and many responsibilities…especially at this time of year. The Wiz assured her that Santa had a terrific sense of humor and that he would get the joke. Chet asked, ‘But what if he throws me off his lap?’ Daryl replied, ‘There are Christmas Pillows all around his Great Chair…in order to cushion his fall if he should trip getting into the Christmas Throne…of getting out of it to go to the restroom…’ Santa would have at his right hand his customary Christmas Pipe and his Apple Pie Tobacco. He relished refilling his Pipe and blowing giant smoke rings that circled his head like a wreath… His Merscham Christmas Pipe was specially crafted for him by his Lead Elf Humphrey Bogart…who was named after the famous actor. Santa cherished his Pipe and ashtray…handmade by Lauren Bacall…and you know who her namesake is…

Christmas Eve Party had arrived and Billy B. and Jane and Chet and Daryl and The Wiz had prepared the holiday hi-jinks. Daryl had fifty Christmas Crackers and had asked his father to recruit the entire third-grade class to assist in simultaneously pulling them apart at the moment that Chet asked Santa for a Red Rider BB Gun. Santa had just laid his Christmas Merscham Pipe on his precious handmade ashtray and invited Chet onto his lap to utter his Christmas request. When Chet said that he wanted a Red Rider BB Gun and Santa responded that he would shoot his eye out…all fifty Christmas Crackers went off in unison… Santa threw Chet off his lap and Chet hit the handmade ashtray made by Lauren Bacall and the Merschem Christmas Pipe hit the pillows and ignited their cloth coverings. The ashtray was broken and the Pipe was cracked and Santa yelled…Krampus…

‘Krampus is a horned figure in Alpine folklore who during the Christmas Season, scares children who have misbehaved. He assists St. Nicholas…

It is a lovely December day in Southern Illinois. It feels chilly but not cold…but then again I think it is all a matter of climatization. I noticed on my calendar that Christmas is sneaking up on me. It is 12 days away. I thought for some time that the Christmas Carol, ‘The Twelve Days of Christmas’, was speaking of 12 days before Christmas…but in reality, it begins with Christmas Day. Since I learned the beginning of the 12 Days…I have taken some joy in knowing that the Christmas Season does not conclude with Christmas Day.

I was talking with my good friend of many years, recently, and I mentioned that life for me has been a battle with the dark side of my nature. Later I wondered if that sounded more ominous than I intended. Simply put life presents each of us with a basket of reversals and disappointments and difficult scenarios. I remember experiencing significant negative thoughts when my mom and dad divorced. I had a very dark opinion of my father…as I knew how much my mother suffered from the separation. Being a mere youngster I was settling into a cynical attitude and it felt comfortable to me and justified in view of my life experience. When one day a light bulb turned on in my brain and I decided to strive to be positive and to see the good in people and situations. Thus…I have a bit of Christmas…all year long.

The great philosopher, Forrest Gump’s mother, said, ‘Life is like a box of chocolates…you never know what you are going to get.’ Indeed that is the case for us humans…and it is both the sugar and spice of our daily lives and the castor oil of our existence. The years fly by so quickly that at times we feel like our heads are spinning. Some of us take comfort in truisms that others assure us are the way to live our lives and the certain path to streets of gold and gates of pearl. Certainly, it is comforting to have a narrow view of the challenges of existence…but the reality of the banality of that comfort is a bit of tunnel vision and a missing of the forest for the trees… We may sing that, ‘Jesus loves the little children…,’ and yet only be aware of our own children or the children in our social group or the clique that we belong to.

Christmas is the message of hope for the hopeless. The coming of the Christ Child to a suffering world. The Christmas Star leads the Shepards to the Messiah…and they are called by the same God who compelled the Three Wise Men…The Three Kings…The Magi…

There is so much beauty in our world. Love is transformative and hope is eternal… As much as is within our power let us focus on the good…and shun the evil…